Without freedom from the past, it’s hard to move on. You have to find a way to let go of life as you knew it before a change occurred. Only then can you successfully transition to something new. Otherwise, you will be controlled by your past and not be able to exercise your freedom of choice in new situations and circumstances.
You have to make a conscious decision to let go of what was, what you wanted, what you hoped for, what you envisioned, what you planned for, and what should have been. You need to dig deep and find the courage to imagine something new and different for yourself and for those closest to you, too.
To experience true freedom from the past, you need to allow yourself to grieve. Grieve the loss of a loved one due to death or divorce. Grieve what might have been, what you fondly remember about your relationship, and then envision what still can be in the years ahead of you.
The same is true when you lose your job due to downsizing. Whether you liked your work or not, your adjustment to losing your colleagues, your financial security, and your work identity will require some time and emotional adjustments. Even if you choose to retire, you must grieve the loss of work relationships and benefits.
No matter what change you are experiencing, choose to let go and grieve so you can experience freedom from the past. You then have more choices available to you as you transition to the next stage of life.